var mess = new Array('"Humor is merely tragedy standing on its head with its pants torn." — Irvin S. Cobb','"Above all else: go out with a sense of humor. It is needed armor. Joy in one\'s heart and some laughter on one\'s lips is a sign that the person down deep has a pretty good grasp of life." — Hugh Sidey','"A person without a sense of humor is like a wagon without springs - jolted by every pebble in the road." — Henry Ward Beecher','"There is more logic in humor than in anything else. Because, you see, humor is truth." — Victor Borge','"You can turn painful situations around through laughter. If you can find humor in anything - even poverty - you can survive it." — Bill Cosby','"Man is the only animal that laughs and weeps, for he is the only animal that is struck with the difference between what things are and what they ought to be."— William Hazlitt','"The problem with those bumper stickers that warn against tailgating is that I have to get really close to the person\'s car to read them." — John Alejandro King','"Angels can fly because they take themselves lightly; devils fall because of their gravity." — G.K. Chesterton','"There\'s no trick to being a humorist when you have the whole government working for you." — Will Rogers (1879-1935)','"Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you walk into an open sewer and die." — Mel Brooks (1926- )','"Humor is a rubber sword - it allows you to make a point without drawing blood." — Mary Hirsch','"The wit makes fun of other persons; the satirist makes fun of the world; the humorist makes fun of himself." — James Thurber (1894-1961)','"Common sense and a sense of humor are the same thing, moving at different speeds. A sense of humor is just common sense, dancing." — William James','"If there\'s one thing I know, it\'s God does love a good joke." — Hugh Elliott','"A sense of humor is part of the art of leadership, of getting along with people, of getting things done."
— Dwight D. Eisenhower','"Humor is always based on a modicum of truth. Have you ever heard a joke about a father-in-law?"
— Dick Clark','"Humor is the great thing, the saving thing. The minute it crops up, all our irritations and resentments slip away and a sunny spirit takes their place."
— Mark Twain','"Humor is a rubber sword - it allows you make a point without drawing blood." — Mary Hirsch'); var max = mess.length; var num = Math.floor((Math.random() * max)); document.writeln(mess[num]);